Straight Up with Sherri

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Iraq Speaks...........

I wanted to write about Jalal Talabani's editorial in The London Times but Mack the Knife has done such a GREAT job writing about it, I will just share HIS piece with you. (use the link)


Jalal Talabani

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

New Orleans Police Beat a SOBER MAN?

"I haven't had a drink in 25 years," Davis said. He had stitches beneath his left eye, a bandage on his left hand and complained of soreness in his back and aches in his left shoulder.

Saturday, October 08, 2005


What Did He Know? And When Did He Know It? (Gone AMUCK!)


I read this FIRST thing this morning. OH! It's going to be a GOOD DAY!
(emphasis in article below is ALL mine!)

Democrats to force Dobson to testify?
Senator wants to know if he's hiding Miers' pro-life views

Democrats on the Senate Judiciary Committee might subpoena James Dobson during the confirmation hearings for Harriet Miers to probe the family advocate about "confidential" information he has about the Supreme Court nominee, a Capitol Hill source says.
(Yeah, Like Dobson now has confidential clearance that U.S. senators do not have...uh,huh,yeah, that's the ticket,eh?)

Dobson recently said his endorsement of Miers was founded on "confidential" information he was "privy to" but "not at liberty to talk about," according to the political weblog
Ankle Biting Pundits. (Sounds almost like a witness protection program deal! And I thought blogs (conservative blogs) were just a bunch of pajama wearin' fools.....)

Although not a Judiciary Committee member, Sen. Ken Salazar, D-Colo., has taken up the cause, pitching the idea to top Democratic staffers on the panel.

"It seems to me, all of the [information] the White House knows about Harriet Miers should be made available to the Senate and the American people," Salazar said.
"If they're making information available to Dr. Dobson – whom I respect and disagree with from time to time – I believe that information should be shared equally with a U.S. senator." (If You tell him you HAVE to tell ME? Now EVERY word uttered must be available to a U.S. senator? Would you like to know what we had for dinner last night?)

Citing "insiders," the weblog says Salazar believes Dobson should be called before the panel to answer what he knows about Miers, when he knew it and who provided him with the information. (Bwaaahaaahaaaaahaaaaaa!)

The unspoken suspicion is that someone in the Bush administration – presumably presidential adviser Karl Rove – told Dobson that Miers is pro-life and has pledged to vote against Roe v. Wade should she be confirmed, the weblog says.
(So now SUSPICION of a converstaion is worthy of a Congressional subpeona? Like FAKE but ACCURATE? Or more like SERIOUSNESS OF THE CHARGE?)

Some of Salazar's colleagues, however, including Minority Leader Harry Reid, believe calling Dobson before the committee as a hostile witness would be seen as a disastrous public relations stunt that would further alienate the Democrat Party from Christian conservatives.
(DUH!? YA THINK?!?!? But don't pay no attention to US, that ship has sailed! DO you really think that ONLY Christian conservatives would find this a bad idea? LOL!- Oh, yeah that's right- we are the stuuuupid red-staters. The rest of the country is just like the KOS kids.......)

"We're not going to conduct an Inquisition," one top Hill staffer told the weblog.
"Salazar's idea is half-baked." (DING! DING! DING! WE HAVE A WINNER!)

But another Hill staffer said Sen. Ted Kennedy, a Judiciary Committee member, likes the idea and is trying to craft it as a "separation of powers" issue rather than a religious issue. (hee heee heeeeee, the sheeple are soo stuupid. hee hee heeeee, yeah SEPERATION of POWERS, heee heee heee)

It might work, Kennedy believes,
if Democrats can make it an issue of President Bush withholding information. (Drink another one Teddy, and then see how you can DECEIVE the AMERICAN people AGAIN- just for your own lust of power......creating issues is just perfect.....)

If you would like to sound off on this issue, participate in today's WND Poll.

This is just a PERFECT example of WHY the Democrats keep LOSING ELECTIONS! It's like a high school track runner sneaking into the locker room and filling his opponents sneakers with itching powder, only he actually sabotaged his OWN sneakers.

Friday, October 07, 2005

Tom Talks to Billy About Christopher Columbus.....

Tom Purcell is a friend of mine and a syndicated columnist. You can find his column weekly in The Jewish World Review,, and Pittsburgh Tribune-Review. He has added me to his distribution list and given me permission to share it, even if I get it up before the other guys do- YAY! I thought you all may enjoy him.

“Dad, why does America celebrate Columbus day?”

“Well, Billy, in 1492, Christopher Columbus sailed from Europe to America and founded the very first settlement in the new world. His arrival marks the beginning of America as we know it.”

“But didn’t he discover America by accident, dad?”

“Columbus believed the earth was a small sphere. He thought he could reach the Far East by setting off on a westward course. Though he stumbled upon what is now the Bahamas by accident, he was still a great explorer and a great man, Billy.”

“A great man, dad, or a racist oppressor?”

“Pardon me, son?”

“When Columbus came to America, he brought with him the greed of the white European males who subsequently colonized America for the dough. They fought and killed the Indigenous Peoples who were already here and took their land and their gold. Columbus eventually died a very rich man.”

“Well, Billy, an unfortunate part of human history involves countries invading their neighbors to take control. This has happened in many parts of the world, including Europe, which has a long history of war. But remember that Indigenous Peoples were also prone to war and fighting to expand their control well before Europeans arrived.”

“Well, Columbus is also responsible for many germs and diseases that Europeans brought to America, causing untold suffering and death among the people who were here before us.”

“Have you been drinking too much caffeine lately, Billy?”

“America’s history of environmental destruction can also be laid at Columbus’s feet, dad. As soon as the Europeans colonized America’s pristine lands, they cut down the trees and plowed up the fields. Can you say soil erosion, dad?”

“Son, did I ever tell you that you take after your mother’s side?”

“And what about slavery? It was the Europeans who created a flourishing slave trade in America. They did it to develop the land cheaply, so they could make giant profits. Columbus even made slaves out of some of the Indigenous Peoples who attacked him and his men.”

“Son, do you remember where your mother hid the bourbon?”

“I’ll tell you another thing, dad. The only reason we even celebrate Columbus Day is because he was Italian, and the day is also a celebration of Italian heritage. When FDR mad Columbus Day official in 1934, he did it not just because Columbus discovered the New World, but because Italian immigrants in America represented millions of votes.”

“Look, Billy, there are a lot of ways to look at what Christopher Columbus symbolizes. You can focus on the negative attributes, and there are some, or you can do what America has been doing for many years now: focus on the positive.”

“Positive, dad?”

“Sure, Billy. Columbus represents the spirit of exploration, the spirit of pushing forward into the great unknown to find greater and better things. This has always been the spirit of America, the land of innovation and new ideas.”

“What kind of ideas, dad?”

“How about the ideas of freedom and self-government, Billy? After Columbus opened a gateway to the new world, other European countries established colonies here, too. Eventually, some amazing historical figures would evolve in North America. They would create and fight for a way of life that has proved to be extremely successful – their ideas are STILL spreading and changing the world for the better.”

“Really, dad?”

“Yes, son. The concept of freedom has taken root so solidly in America that people are free to criticize or praise anything, including whether or not Christopher Columbus was a hero or an ogre, or whether or not Columbus Day should still be celebrated in America. Now, do you have any other questions about history?”

“Sure, dad. Was Benjamin Franklin really a predatory male chauvinist womanizer?”

(Tom Purcell’s e-mail address is; his Web address is
Read Tom's Latest Column by Clicking Here:

Psssst, Tom, my divorce is final- but we'll have to do something about Billy.............

Wednesday, September 28, 2005


Right Wing Nut Job on Tom Delay:

Is Tom Delay a Crook?

Tuesday, August 30, 2005





Sunday, August 21, 2005

Whodda Thunk?

Court rules atheism a religionDecides 1st Amendment protects prison inmate's right to start study group

A federal court of appeals ruled yesterday Wisconsin prison officials violated an inmate's rights because they did not treat atheism as a religion.

"Atheism is [the inmate's] religion, and the group that he wanted to start was religious in nature even though it expressly rejects a belief in a supreme being," the 7th Circuit Court of Appeals said.

The court decided the inmate's First Amendment rights were violated because the prison refused to allow him to create a study group for atheists.

Brian Fahling, senior trial attorney for the American Family Association Center for Law & Policy, called the court's ruling "a sort of Alice in Wonderland jurisprudence."

"Up is down, and atheism, the antithesis of religion, is religion," said Fahling.

The Supreme Court has said a religion need not be based on a belief in the existence of a supreme being. In the 1961 case of Torcaso v. Watkins, the court described "secular humanism" as a religion.

Fahling said today's ruling was "further evidence of the incoherence of Establishment Clause jurisprudence."

"It is difficult not to be somewhat jaundiced about our courts when they take clauses especially designed to protect religion from the state and turn them on their head by giving protective cover to a belief system, that, by every known definition other than the courts' is not a religion, while simultaneously declaring public expressions of true religious faith to be prohibited," Fahling said.

I LOVE THIS STORY! I guess this now means I can call atheists religious zealots! YEAH!

Friday, August 19, 2005

Tom Purcell went sailing!

On Sailing with Women

I had a bad feeling as soon as I got onto the boat.

It was a small rented sailboat that was piloted by two women. They women had taken a few sailing lessons and wanted to try out their nautical prowess on the Potomac River. I and two other fellows went along for the ride.

And what a ride it was. Shortly after we boarded, one of the women, a lawyer, began lecturing us on sailing techniques. She told us about the jib, the small sail up front, and how to move it from one side to another by releasing one jib rope and pulling the other.

She explained what it meant to “tack,” or shift the sails from one side to another to catch the wind and change direction. She lectured us with a seriousness you’d encounter at a sexual-harassment seminar.

No sooner did her lecture conclude than the winds whipped up and grabbed the sails. We were yanked out to the great unknown at the neck-snapping speed of two miles per hour.

“Let go of the jib!” she shouted to one of the men, who, being a man, felt the need to do something, so he grabbed the jib rope. I later learned he was her ex-husband and they still lived together.

“But if I pull the jib tighter, it will catch more wind,” he speculated. Men speculate, you see. A lack of actual knowledge never interferes with our perpetual quest to resolve problems.

“Release the jib now!”

“But if I --”

“I said let go of the damn jib!”

He let go of the damn jib. His surrender, and the embarrassment we felt for him, set the tone for the rest of the torturous outing.

No matter where you sit on a sailboat piloted by women, you are in the way. Your head is perpetually getting struck by ropes, pulleys and sail rods. If you attempt to do nothing, the women yell at you to pull the damn jib. If you pull the damn jib, they demand you release it. If you release it, they demand you pull it tighter.

I got to thinking about this episode after reading about Women’s Equality Day, to be celebrated Friday, August 26th. Congress established it in 1971 to spotlight women’s efforts at achieving equality. It is celebrated on August 26th, because that’s the day women won the right to vote back in 1920.

Things sure have changed since then.

It used to be that women were held back in this country. They had few options but to marry and become mothers, and they were then expected to stay home while the men went off to run the country.

Today, the potential of women has been unleashed and we’re all better off. Women are excelling in every profession. More women than men are enrolling in college and more are earning advanced degrees. Nearly 40% of all businesses in America are owned by women.

It’s true that women have not yet achieved parity at the top levels of corporate America. It’s also true that women earn 75% of what men do, though doesn’t this have more to do with the choices women can now make than discrimination?

Women can stay single and climb the corporate ladder. They can marry, have a family and hire a nanny to watch the kids. They can suspend their career, which will reduce their earning potential later when they return to work, to stay home with the kids. There are a million choices available and women are choosing every variation under the sun.

And they’re piloting sailboats.

It used to be that when five people got onto a sailboat, it was the men who sat in the back barking orders. They’d soon get to bickering and turn an otherwise delightful outing into a miserable affair.

Now it’s the women who are doing that. While they focus intensely on their piloting duties, it’s the men who are adrift at sea.

Men who aren’t sure whether they should pull or release the damn jib.

(Tom Purcell’s e-mail address is; his Web address is

TOOOOOOO FAR!!!!!!!!!!

That's IT! I have HAD IT! I have NEVER blasted the ACLU on this blog before, but now I have HAD IT! The ACLU was created to fight for civil liberites for United States' Citizens. They were NOT created to fight for FOREIGN NATIONALS, especially ILLEGAL ones. They were certainly not created to protect ENEMIES of America and TERRORISTS! In fact, I would venture to say that they were created to STOP terror being imposed onto people. HOW THINGS CHANGE! If you are giving ONE RED CENT to the ACLU, then I, personally, consider you to be an enemy to the United States of America. PERIOD!!!!!!

ACLU to Gitmo inmates: Don't talk
Prisoners advised of 'right' not to answer interrogators

Thursday, August 18, 2005

Peace Plan?

This plan will not bring peace.

I awoke yesterday morning to see IDF soldiers literally kicking in the doors of a Jewish family in Gaza. My heart broke as I watched such an intimate moment of grief and despair unfold before my eyes. Part of me felt guilty to be witnessing this event. Part of me was filled with such admiration for a family stricken with such tragedy responding without violence and struggling to have their voice heard. The family spoke of their arrival in 1976 to a desert land. They had come to farm the land, and make it fertile. They were greeted by an imam that brought them salt and bread, welcoming them, begging them to farm this land to provide jobs for his people. SO much has changed...........

As the men began to cut and tear their clothes (an Old Testament sign of mourning for Jews), I had to catch my breath. When the children began singing from Psalms (the Torah) I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I don't know what the orange bracelets and clothing symbolize, but it was obvious there was a message with this color.

This is hard for for me to grasp. Of course, we can't feel compassion for these people without realizing how the people of Egypt, Syria, and Lebanon must have felt when Israel was created, and what they went through when their lands were lost in the Six Day War. One commentator on FOX News claimed the fact that they lost their land because they attacked Israel and lost was no point at all because, the result is the same. I beg to differ with THAT. A dead father is a dead father, the pain and result is the same for a family, yet a father killed BY a drunk driver is definitely different than a father killed because HE was driving drunk.

If this world TRULY wants peace, the anti-Semitism MUST STOP! PERIOD! As part of the world seeks Israel to live in peace with its neighbors, another part of the world seeks to expel Jews from the earth. Then there is the part of the world that is so busy trying to understand both sides, and afraid to be "UNCARING" that they just get in the way of the entire process. We can sift through history and debate it until we are blue in the face. The bottom line is that we are no longer IN HISTORY. We cannot go back and change ANYTHING. We are HERE, NOW. Israel seeks peace, not conquering the world. Are there some Jews that are hate filled? Sure. Are there some Muslims that are NOT determined to act like savages counting each Jewish death as a blessing? Sure. But these people are not the majority on either side.

What can we do? I don't have all answers. ALL I can come to is that the only way to STOP this cycle of violence is to rid ourselves of the HATRED. Getting the Jews out of Israel will NOT stop terrorism or violence. Unless you are willing to go back to Hitler's plan to exterminate a whole people based on race, we need to take a stand to rid the hate. These are the only choices. The kicker to all of it is this. Even if the Jews were shaken off the earth, the violence will not stop.

Poeple in America have at times claimed that "fundamentalist" Christians are just as dangerous as the "fundamentalist" Muslims. WHAT A LIE! True Christians are not the least bit interested in using violence to rid the world of all Non-Christians. Christians will quickly step up and denounce violence. They condemn killing abortion doctors and bombing clinics. The difference in the Christian religious zealot and the Muslim religious zealot is not just stark, but CLEAR.

Groups like
HAMAS will not stop until the Jews are GONE, PERIOD.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

A Fall OF Grace

Skydiver's desperate prayer answered
Felt 'warm embrace' as he survived spiraling plunge to Earth

A first-time skydiver who survived a 3,500-foot plunge to Earth after his parachute failed to open properly says he experienced extraordinary comfort as he prayed on the way down.

Daniel Levi Cave, speaking from his hospital room in Seattle yesterday, told the "Today" show's Matt Lauer he made a last-minute plea to God.

"I said, 'OK, well, I trust you, I believe in you, and if there's any way, I'd love to see my family again, so help me out here.'

Cave continued: "And I just felt – I got to say, I just felt like the biggest hug in the world and just this warm embrace. It was the most amazing thing ever. And at that point, I thought, either way, this is going to turn out good, so, and here I am. I don't know how."

Read it all!

Saturday, August 13, 2005


To say that being a mother is the hardest job in the world is so cliche. It is said so often that we really don't give it any thought. Most people think about the hours, and the selflessness put into it and miss the REAL meaning of the statement. Even us mothers nod, and know it's true, we don't often spend time thinking about what TRULY makes the job of being a mother so hard. Today was one of those days for me that helped to put this old cliche back into focus for me.

My son is 16. He is kinda little for his age compared to the other kids at school, and it is especially noticeable when he steps out onto the football field (or stands on the sidelines). He's a Junior this year- and it is his FIRST year playing football. He is very athletic, built and cut well, but still pretty small and quite inexperienced in organized sports, let alone FOOTBALL! He comes home each day after practice and shares how much he lifted, how many 40 yrd sprints he won (6 out of 15 he came in first- he is pretty fast). He plays wingback, but would LOVE to play safety or wide receiver, and with his speed and ability to jump- he would fair pretty well in those positions. But with his size and just starting to play his Junior year, he truly lacks the self-confidence and experience to SHINE.

I am a typical mom, and think everything he does is awesome and I am very proud. I see the talent he possesses quite easily. I also see the tender ego and heart of a 16 year old boy that grew up without his father in his life until he was 14, and how he struggles to find the man inside of him. I see how he measures himself by others. It is normal for 16 year old boys to go through this, but it also breaks my heart. It is particularly painful because I know that no matter how well-adjusted he his, he still feels the sting from the abandonment of his father in his early years and the pain he has endured by my poor decisions.

His first scrimmage game was last Friday, and I was the typical mom, jumping out of my seat exclaiming "Kevin's on the field! Kevin's on the field!" the very first time I saw him run for a play. I laughed at myself, of course. His little sisters, 5 and 6, clamored at the fence yelling his name as he stood on the sidelines, and he graciously turned and smiled and waved. How nice of him not to get embarrassed and try to ignore them. It was such a relief to see his teammates think it was cute too, instead of razzing him over it.

But tonight was different. Tonight he looked agitated on the sidelines. He finally got to get in for one play- the second to last play of the game. It was at the other end of the field and since I was firmly planted in the front row, I really didn't get to see it. The game ended, and we waited by the locker room as he came to get out of uniform. I walked up to him, slapped him on the shoulder and said "Hey, All-Star!" He turned around to look at me, and I could see the fury all over his face. "What's wrong?" I asked. "I RAN INTO THE QUARTERBACK!" He snapped, and I saw the tears well up in his eyes. MY HEART SHATTERED!

How could I fix this? What do I do? What do I say? The mother in me wanted to grab him and hug him and tell him everything was okay, just let him cry. But THANK GOD I am a bit wiser than that, or am I? As my insides burned and my arms ached to hold him, I smiled and said, "Hey, at least you didn't get your hands on the ball and run to the wrong end zone." He rolled his eyes and tried to smile. "Shake it off! It was one play." I said "My ONLY PLAY." He mumbled, and he disappeared into the locker room.

I stood outside, waiting. I rocked back and forth wishing there were a man there to tell me how to handle this without destroying him. I mean, as parents. we just don't have all the answers. We are doing ALL we can just to not totally WRECK their lives. I knew this was a crossroad moment in his life. This young teenager, trying to be a man, had come to a point where how he handled this could effect how he handled failure the rest of his life, especially on the BIG things in his life. This was a moment that would set a pattern for so many things. At this age they hang their identity on things that nobody else ever remembers. OH- I NEEDED HELP! How do I ease the pain? How do I allow him the opportunity to feel the pain without adding to it, and at the same time help him keep this tiny moment in perspective? How do I make sure he doesn't let this moment haunt him or define him without belittling how he feels?

This was truly a moment that required an academy award-winning performance from me, and the wisdom of ANYONE BUT ME! As my heart broke, my mind raced for the answer on what to do. I racked my brain, trying to think of a man I could call in for reinforcements. Okay, to be totally I honest- I was trying to think of a man that I could hand this whole thing over to and say- "Please fix this! I am afraid to touch it! I'll mess it all up! Here- YOU TAKE IT! PLEASE!" Finally I calmed down and the answer came to me.

He came out of the locker room and we walked to the car. On the way, I asked him if the coach said anything to him about it. This is when he explained that the coach sent in 3 guys. 2 wingbacks and a tailback- but no fullback. The quarterback told my son to play fullback. So, of course, he had NO IDEA WHAT HE WAS SUPPOSED TO DO OR WHERE HE WAS SUPPOSED TO GO! When he came off the field, the coach asked him, "What happened?" My son told him. The coach said, "Oh, my bad," and just shrugged it off. I just laughed and said "Well, that's cool. If the coach said 'My bad' then no worries." "But it was my ONLY play." was all he could say. But that was okay, I had a plan. "I got surprise for you." I told him.

We all piled into the car and I headed to Hollywood Video. I ran in and came out with a bag of movies. When we got home, I called my dad to tell him what happened, how I handled it, and what I was about to do, as my son took a shower. Thank GOD, my dad agreed. I had spent some time on the way home sharing with him some of my most embarrassing moments, and explained to him that he would live through it, and this moment just didn't define him and not to let it haunt him. My dad thought it was great that I didn't make it a BIG deal, despite my urge to coddle him and help him lick his wounds. Treating it like just another funny moment in life was pretty good. He was also thrilled with the next step. My son got out of the shower, and we sat down to watch "RUDY."

We laughed, we cried, and we cheered. As we read the little message at the end about how NO ONE had been carried off the Notre Dame field since 1975, my son looked at me and said "AMAZING MOVIE." He hugged me tight and said "Thanks mom!"

He then got on his computer and checked his zenga (OY!), kissed me goodnight and went off to bed. Right now he is laying in bed, drifting off to sleep. He has no idea that I just had one of the most TERRIFYING nights of my life, and I am PRAYING that I didn't just do EVERYTHING WRONG as a mother. He has no inkling that I hope I was a good mom tonight, and that it may be 20 years before I ever find out if I fumbled, or made a game winning Hail Mary catch in the end zone with 2 seconds on the clock. Chances are, I did neither. Chances are, I made a simple play that either gained a few yards or lost a few yards on the vast field of his life. As parents we get in a LOT of plays. But for THIS ONE HUGE MOMENT in his life, it was MY ONLY PLAY of the game.

Friday, August 12, 2005


Yes, YOU can save the life of a soldier. You can save a child the agony of losing a parent, or mother and father from losing a child, a spouse from being widowed.

The helmets that our troops use are the same type issued during WWII. With the way war has changed- more troops are killed by the IED's than bullets. Sadly enough, many of them lose their life not from the blast itself, but from the force of the blast and the way the helmet impacts the skull. You can read more on this by following the link provided below.

There is a life saving kit that can be provided to our troops for their helmets to avoid these deaths. If you have extra cash- please show your support for our troops by investing in them in a life-saving way. There is plenty of argument to be made about why our soldiers are not provided this life saving kit already, but until we can address this issue, let's not waste time and waste precious lives.

Just for the sake of covering some of the debate on this issue:

It sickens me that we are more concerned about giving SPECIAL meals to Club Gitmo TERRORISTS than spending the money on saving the lives of our brave soldiers. It further sickens me that POLITICS, POWER, and GREED get in the way by those WE HIRED to have charge over such spending and decisions. It INFURIATES me that the MEDIA spends more time pandering to TERRORISTS and "PROTECTING" THEM than the men and women GIVING THEIR LIVES so that these childish media people can ACTUALLY EXERCISE their first amendment rights. What a WASTE of their talents, gifts, and opportunity. Someone once commented that I would make a terrible reporter. May I just say, "AMEN MY FRIEND, YOU GOT THAT RIGHT!"

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Tom Purcell on Gay Marriage

When Heterosexual Men Marry (Each Other)

The law of unintended consequences always produces interesting results. Here’s a doozy.

Two heterosexual fellows in Canada, invoking their rights under Canada’s recently passed same-sex marriage legislation, have announced their intentions to marry. Drinking pals Bill Dalrymple, 56, and Bryan Pinn, 65, intend to marry not because they are gay but for the tax breaks.

News of the pending engagement didn’t sit well with same-sex marriage activist Bruce Walker, a Toronto lawyer. He complained that marriage should be for love.

Well, who is Walker to criticize? He used to argue that if two consenting adults of the same sex wanted to marry, it was nobody’s business but theirs. Now that two fellows of the same sex want to marry – perhaps to qualify for family discounts at the neighborhood pub -- what business is it of his?

Where Canada is concerned, marital preconditions are over, and good riddance.

It used to be that marriage was sacred. A man would leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife as one flesh. It was a powerful commitment, a duty, an institution. What’s worse, it meant you weren’t allowed to see another woman naked for the rest of your life.

It used to be that governments gave breaks to married folks because it was ultimately good for society. The family has always been the building block of a healthy society, and encouraging family life was good for everyone.

It’s true that heterosexual men and women have made a mess out of traditional marriage. Nearly half of all marriages end in divorce – and that only pertains to folks who bother marrying. Many heterosexual folks prefer cohabitation, as it provides many of the goodies of marriage without the hassles.

But cohabitation frequently fails and men and women become so suspicious of each other, they end up living alone. That means millions of single women spend their free time playing with their two cats, while millions of single men are slumped over a bar stool.

That’s why those two heterosexual Canadian fellows may be on to something. Perhaps more people should marry their buddies.

If single heterosexual women married their female friends, they’d avoid the loneliness of single life, while enjoying the benefits of marriage. If one was a member of a country club, for instance, the other would be able to join as her “spouse.” The only downside of women marrying their friends would be a significant increase in four-cat households, but then you can’t have everything.

Single heterosexual men could enjoy similar benefits from marrying their buddies. They would never spend their weekends window shopping at the Crate and Barrel with their “spouse,” but business would be brisk at the Keg and Barrel.

You’d find married heterosexual fellows doing all kinds of things they could never do with a real wife. The natural course of any man who is single long enough, after all, is to wake up in a pile of dirty laundry still clutching the tequila bottle he began sipping out of a few days before. At least if he married a buddy, he’d be able to self-destruct with a little company.

Such a married couple would sit up all night drinking beer and watching Beavis and Butthead reruns. They’d argue over who is hotter, Liv Tyler or Halle Berry (and Halle wins hands down). If a fight broke out and guacamole dip ended up all over the rug, who cares.

Such an existence would be unthinkable with a wife. A real wife would never guide her husband to the bathroom after he won a drinking contest down at the VFW, and she certainly wouldn’t celebrate his victory the following morning by bringing him a Big Mac, a large Coke and a bottle of aspirin.

Perhaps America ought to follow the lead of its courageous neighbors up north. Instead of working to strengthen marriage as an institution, we ought to broaden it. We ought to make its benefits available to any consenting adults who want at them.

Such as married drinking pals, who deserve the right to spend their tax savings buying extra rounds at the pub.

(Tom Purcell’s e-mail address is; his Web address is

Tom, I don't have ANY cats, I don't shop for crates or barrels, and I could probably out drink you at the VFW ( I may require an escort to the bathroom though). Oh, and my divorce should be final within 60 days.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Terrorism, Pedophiles, and.......Dating?

What do these things have in common? Profiling. The word games played by vultures clamoring for political power and MONEY are just that- GAMES!

When searching for terrorists, there is a profile. Do ALL terrorists fit this "profile?" NO! It is a method used for all sorts of things. If your 6 year old daughter disappears from her bed in the middle of the night, the first thing the cops do is start with pedophiles and sex offenders known to be in the area. I know- I know- someone is already whining about how these guys have already been convicted of a crime, blah, blah, blah. But hold on a second. WHY do the police start with these particular folks? It's not just because they can. It is because they are the most LOGICAL place to start. It's not like they sit around waiting for missing little girls so they can go harass the sex offenders. They start with the sex offenders because the PURPOSE is to FIND THE MISSING GIRL! The PURPOSE of taking an extra look at folks utilizing public transportation is to STOP TERROR ATTACKS! It is not a scheme designed to harass people.

Profiling is even done with dating. We all do it with the dating game. For instance. If I were looking for a man to date- I have a profile. He has to have a job (a steady job), a car, no criminal history (especially pedophilia), etc... Can I find ALL these things and still end up with a scumbag- YOU BETCHA! Could I find an incredible man who has no job, no car, and a vacation period compliments of the American tax payer in a resort with barred windows? Possible. The numbers are greater if I stick with the profile. Why waste time dating an ex-con with no car and no job? Men, on other hand, may kick me out of the running because they have no interest in women with kids. Especially women with THREE kids!

Should we check granny? Sure we should. After watching Robin Williams and Dustin Hoffman on the BIG SCREEN, no telling what terrorists could try. But do we ONLY do random searches? DO we totally give Middle Eastern men between the ages of 18 and 35 a pass for fear of "OFFENDING" or looking "RACIST?" NO WAY, JACK! It isn't about RACISM, it is about a PROFILE! It is about taking the information you have, and making educated and thoughtful decisions. THIS is the LEAST I expect from those charged with the duty to protect me and MY CHILDREN!

Enough of the smoke screen. PC is dangerous enough to our society without drowning ourselves in blood in order to create racism that doesn't exist. There is REAL racism in this world. Let's stop insulting the REAL ISSUE of racism with such ridiculous charges in the case of terrorism.